Henna looked at herself in the mirror just before her photo shoot then she quickly looked away. A figure that she could not quite recognize stared back at her. The figure looked perfect in a glamorous tight-fitting dress with hair so neatly done, not a strand was out of place. She felt torn apart on the inside. The depression she hoped would disappear seemed to intensify. She could not understand how it was so possible to feel so right in one minute and the next like she was some useless rag people took advantage of.
Henna quickly wiped the tears from her eyes and re-applied her make-up. Henna pulled herself together. She knew she had to get over everything which had hurt her so deeply in the past. Henna looked to her modeling career hoping it would compensate for all the loneliness and rejection she faced growing up.
As the weeks flew by, Henna’s dream unfolded into reality. Her fame as a model increased. She enjoyed being stopped for autographs as she walked down the street. Everywhere she went everyone knew her name. She felt as though she had finally arrived. Henna was finally living her share of the rich and famous. Her past would finally mean nothing at all.
Yet in all this success and fame it was only a few months later Henna was pacing around her room in a state of panic. Henna had just returned from a successful meeting, securing one of the most envied top modeling jobs. Henna could not understand with all the fame and success why she felt miserable and dead inside. The ‘high’ she experienced in her career had slowly disappeared ushering in a dark cloud of depression. It seemed that the more wealth and fame she acquired, the more miserable she became.
Henna had to keep going. She hoped she would find the strength within herself to get through it all. But the pressure of securing such a large job had been so intense she could not go another day in the pretense of living the perfect life. All her life she had been convinced the only way to be happy was to live in success and be famous. Why wasn’t life giving her the satisfaction and fulfillment that she so desired?
“What in the world is wrong with me!” Henna shrieked as she picked up her car keys and threw them at the wall. In in an attempt to relieve her frustration Henna began throwing anything she could grab.
Without thought Henna left her room and ran out of the building onto the street. She began running down the street as fast as she could. Her pace increased as the desire set in to leave everything behind. All of a sudden none of the fame…the success mattered anymore. Deep within her soul she craved freedom. As the tears streamed down her face she knew her choice to leave everything and find freedom was the right one.
Through her tear stained eyes Henna spotted a church building. The urge to find solace pushed her towards the entrance. She entered the building. Henna had not been in church for more than a decade. She her grandma would always talk about Jesus and how He came to earth to redeem humanity from the curse of sin and death. Her grandmother’s words sounded naive and fictitious to her. Henna listened because she had a healthy respect for her Grandma. She could clearly hear her Grandma’s voice in her head as she slowly walked across the empty church building and towards the altar.
“Jesus is the way, the Truth and the Life….It is by Grace that we are saved through faith and not of ourselves, it’s the gift of God…In this is Love, Not that we loved God but that He loved us and gave His son as the atoning sacrifice for our sins.”
She argued her way out of her Grandma’s teaching. Her happiness she perceived rested on fame…wealth…success… It had all proved her wrong! She felt empty and dead inside, she could not carry the weight in her soul any longer!
“Oh God! If you are truly there, please save me!” she cried. “I have everything anybody could wish for but I am so empty, I’m broken and my life is a lie! I was wrong God; nothing has taken the hurt and pain I have carried around for years! I am bitter and angry and I just want to feel some relief…” Henna finally stooped down to her knees and cried until she had no more tears left. For the first time in her life, she felt incredible peace flood her soul and a joy well up in her she could not explain. She knew something had changed in her life and this would mark the start of an incredible journey of true freedom!